December 21, 2013

Annual Family Christmas Letter

Wow, hard to believe we've blown through another year! The French family has been challenged but blessed in 2013. In October, Lew failed the Reader’s Digest Crossword Puzzle Certification when he blanked and couldn't come up with a five letter word for “Name of current US President.” We’re still very proud of him, though, and look forward to the day he doesn't involuntarily shout, “Term for abstract expressionism!” or, “Beans named for Peru’s capital!” at the dinner table.

Our oldest, Vic, moved to Nashville this summer and started incorporating a musical saw into his beats. Surprisingly chill. Unfortunately, he has trouble getting it into club gigs because it’s mistaken for a weapon. His girlfriend, Claire, is a very talented painter. She recently scored a commission to paint Elvis playing strip poker with Miley Cyrus, Brad Paisley, and Amy Grant for the Country Music Hall of Fame.

Jack, continuing his education, maintains such an unrelenting and infectious optimism about the Chicago Bulls that birds actually start singing when he walks in the room. Unfortunately, he takes a lot of shots he shouldn't at waste baskets and pretty much stopped defending when our dog drives the lane for a dropped French fry.

Kristen, a high school senior, has almost recovered from her photography class mishap. Who knew exposure to developing chemicals causes some people to speak Pig Latin? Needless to say, she and Lew got into some pretty strenuous arguments after he asked for help finding a seven letter word for Italian cooking.

As for me, I’m in the final edits of my book, “101 Uses for a Clif Bar.” This project began in February when I completely misread my family’s desire for a case of these nutrient-rich bricks and began experimenting. Did you know they burn and supply heat for 30 minutes in an emergency? That they make water-tight seals in punctured bike tires? For more tips, you’ll have to buy the book LOL.

Lastly, our beloved dog Farley turned 12. Or 13. We adopted her years ago from the Humane Society and they were rather vague about her history. Well, after years of therapy, Farley only barked profanity at children twice this year!

We sure wish you and yours the best as we all journey, ready or not, into 2014! Love, Jane.